why is it on the day you're wearing the daggiest (but comfy) outfit.... after days of wearing nice clothes and making an effort in your appearance....

the day you wake up and just slap on the closest pair of extra baggy jeans and slightly ill-fitting sweater....

why is it on the day where your hair is both fluffy and badly styled, the day where you get caught in the light rain, making your fluffy and badly styled hair start to droop and stick to your face....

why is it THIS DAY, the day you run into the most perfect looking girl you know???? the girl with the fake boobs, teeth and tan, the girl with the beautiful long extensions, the girl will the expensive designer clothes and perfect makeup.

why is it always this day? *sigh*

I'd always thought giant party subs were a myth- every time i'd been somewhere, and subway had been ordered, people always say there will be a giant sub... but it always ends up being sub-platters (platters of subs). So when we got told the other day that work was buying 2 giant party subs for lunch, I didn't get my hopes up.

but, BEHOLD, the beautiful sight which is the PARTY SUB!!!!

That's only one of them, because by the time Billy and I got out to the kitchen, camera in hand, the other one had been pretty much demolished.

I also didn't think they would come in a 6ft long box. I thought "Surely not? No one is going to carry around a 6ft long box... how would they get up the elevator? They must cut the giant party sub into smaller, more managable sizes. Perhaps 3 x 2 ft long?"

But the sandwich artists once again proved me wrong, by providing our giant party subs in 2 very long, very whole 6ft long boxes.

I am so pleased with this discovery, and I so want to have a party now just so I can order giant party subs. heheheh

I just read back over what i wrote, and noticed i had spelt sight wrong. i spelt it 'SITE'. i also automatically spelt tonight as TONITE or sometimes 2nite. *shakes head* tis rather sad.

Check out this crazy flash thing. http://www.izpitera.ru/lj/tetka.swf

I could just watch it for hours, watching the body fall, slamming into the bubbles/balls. You can also click on her and throw her around. Its so fascinating..... or is it just scary that i'm enjoying seeing a body being thrown around and smashed into things?

its not even 9am and my makeup is starting to run already. this website, www.girlsandcorpses.com has had me in tears for the past 5 minutes.

Upcoming Features.....

He Said - She Dead

Find her "D" Spot

6 Ways to Tell If Your Corpse Has Been Messin' Around


Dean came up with a good one "i'm sure he could give her a bone... or two"
teeheehehe

Cindy left for Canberra this morning. she's going to be down there for a week and a half. I'm feeling lonely already. I dont know how people can live by themselves- every morning when I wake up Cindy is already up, tv is on, lights are on. I dont know why, but it makes it easier to wake up when someone else is already up.
its going to be a bit of a struggle next week waking up, especially when its so cold and dark in the mornings.

while she's gone and i'm shopping and cooking for one, i'm tempted to go on some crazy diet. ok well not 'kerazy', like no atkins or soup diet (tho some of those soup recipes look tasty. i would go insane tho after a week of eating the same soup, day in, day out.) Just thinking I should buy lots of salad ingredients and cans of tuna and just have salad and tuna for dinner. Cut back on the heavy carb-loaded meals at night time.

Or it could just be that i'm too lazy to cook a proper meal every night of the week just for myself.

WHAT THE CRAP! i just looked at my weather widget on my computer and it says its 5 degrees (celcius)... at 9am. they take the temperature out near the airport and its never that cold in the city, but 5 degrees?!?!? holy crap, it can't be that cold?!?!? ahhhh winter makes me so miserable. :(

i sort of have plans to go out tonight but its going to be so cold walking from place to place. what do people do, who live in colder climates? i guess you dont have outside beer gardens, that's for sure. and perhaps you just go to one bar/club and stay there- rather than going to a few places throughout the night.... or do you? do you just grin and bear it? i know the beer/wine/alcohol jacket has gotten me through many a cold night, but i'm talking brisbane-cold, which really isn't that cold at all.

tegan and sara are coming to oz in august, and will be touring around supporting Little Birdy. i'm sooooo very excited. and i'm probably going to go to all 4 shows, that are within a few hours from here.... Friday- Brisbane show, Saturday- Maroochydore show, Sunday- Byron Bay show, Tuesday - Gold coast show. Luckily tickets are pretty reasonable, and I dont mind Little Birdy. I haven't really heard that much, but what I have heard, I like.
AHHHHHHH so excited, I'm going to buy so much merch (fingers crossed they bring over some of the kick ass shirts they've had at other shows, and on their merch site)

on that great note, i'm off for another fun friday. pub lunch and free beer friday at work! yay!

its bothering me so much that i can't remember chunks of saturday night. i keep thinking if i delve back into my mind more and more, eventually it will come back to me. i mean i was awake, i was conscious, i must have said and done things, so i SHOULD be able to remember if i try hard enough. but nothing, nothing comes back to me.
why would someone want to fight me? i'm sweet and loveable, and friendly (except if you're a drunken asshole trying to grab my ass)..... i guess alcohol is the thing to blame. somehow alcohol turns me from a friendly, nice, articulate girl, into a drunken, slurring, hoebag with red wine stains and panda eyes, who steps on one too many toes and provokes another drunken hoebag into wanting to start a fight.

i guess it shouldn't matter.its just another funny story to add to my collection, but argh, i just wish i could remember.

i had a great day with mum, i really wish she didn't have to go home and i saw her more often. we did lots of shopping and i have a kick ass new worky grown up outfit... heh, can't wait to wear it tomorrow. god i'm such a girl- clothes make me so happy.

awesome night last night! mum is visiting and we all went to dinner at the mexican restaurant- delicious food, and god i love sangria!!!! we got to the paddo a bit early and the place was chock-a-block full of footy bogans after some broncos game at the stadium down the road. arghhhhhh. we headed down to the comedy club which is down 3 flights of stairs, under the club. everyone was lined up before the doors opened, and there's a car park down one flight down.

mum and i stood out in the carpark to have a cigarette and there were lots of other people hanging out there, waiting for the comedy club doors to open. there was a girl trying to get out of an awkward car park. she had parked in a tight spot that wasn't even a car park, and there was a car now in a car space that made it really hard for her to get out. a few people were helping her get out, forward, back, little by little and then she finally got out. she drove out of the car park and everyone was just standing around talking etc. suddenly there's a huge smash and we realize some guy had just taken a steering wheel lock to the back windscreen of the car that had made it difficult for that other car to get out. it was the boyfriend of the girl driving the car, he just smashed the back windscreen of the other car and piss bolted out of there. we were standing RIGHT next to that car. i was in shock, like what the fuck? the alarm was going off and we all stood their open mouthed, trying to work out what just happened, who he was and why he had done that. i was really suprised when the car alarm cut out after about 30 seconds. what is the bloody use of that???

but i just couldn't believe we had just seen a guy smash a car window for no apart reason. his girlfriend and him were in the wrong for parking in a stupid spot that wasn't a car park. and they got out eventually anyway with NO damage to their car, so what was the point? why act out so violently? and can you imagine being his girlfriend? how is that appealing? i would be so revolted seeing someone i was with act out so violently. even hearing ex's brag about past fights etc was a complete turn off. ergh.

so we all ended up going in and the show was awesome. wil anderson was trashed and he talks sooo fast, which i definately find endearing. i laughed so hard my cheeks hurt and every had a good time. adam hills was the special guest and he joined wil up on stage. there was so many good lines, but of course i can't remember them thru the haze of my hangover, however the gretel killen (australian big brother host) comment - "mutton dressed as whore" was pure gold!

i dont remember how long the show went but we got to the valley about 2.30am... after the show we met wil and adam, got photos yay! and they said they were going to head to rics. so off we went to the valley, and at rics i met scott from tripod. he was really nice and obviously not as wasted as wil, so we managed to have a decent conversation which was awesome. wil anderson was mega trashed and eventually he had to go to bed. he gave me a hug and said nice to meet you and stuff,. oh god, i am so lame and i get so star struck hahahahha. he's just so funny and entertaining. very cool to have met him.

anyway the night wore on, i drank way too much. i spilt red wine on myself and on my new top :( so i was frantically trying to wash it off, running around in the female toilets in only my bra.... i must have thought i got it out, so i went back out for another drink. i seriously seem to have blacked out, because i dont remember how this happened, but i almost got in a fight! all i can remember is this girl being held back by her friend/boyfriend, and mum trying to pull me away. i was so trashed and obviously i was not getting my meaning across very well. all i wanted to say to this girl was 'i dont want to fight, i am just trying to not spill any more of my wine'.. i had spilt more wine on myself from people bumping into me (plus me not being able to stand or walk properly) and must have tried to get past her, push her out of the way or something and it somehow ended up almost a fight. hahahahha i full dont remember what happened, how i got into that situation and its kinda scary that i just cannot remember anything,... just mum and everyone telling me to not worry about it and that we should go.

ahhhhhhh funny shit.

i think we were all home and in bed by 5am, and i was up at 10am, still feeeling drunk. we had yum cha for lunch which was soooo good, and then spent the afternoon doing hair. rach and i both got cuts and colour. bits of my hair are really really fucking blond, damn red was tough to get out, but its pretty much white/blond now.

this pathetic excuse for a post has taken me all afternoon and evening to type up. its now almost 9pm and i'm so very tired. i'm taking the day off tomorrow for some quality mother/daughter bonding session (aka shopping!!!) yay!

the internal editor thingy i use at work is being upgraded at the moment and i can't really do ANYTHING right now, so i thought i'd update. i feel terribly guilty for not blogging anything in such a long time, and then i feel pissed off that blogging has become such a chore. i'd like to blame it on all of you- you who annoy me with your comments, but its not you (well ok, maybe). i just haven't had anything to say. i've been spending alot of good quality time with rach and our daily catch ups have given us (well me) good opportunity to rant and rave, leaving me with nothing to blog about. its good, i'm not complaining. real life company and friendships are kicking ass over online substitutes.

life has been good, albeit a bit monotonous... work, gym, home, dinner/tv/msn, sleep... repeat!

weekends have been lots of fun. last weekend i went to the most awesome 21st. i cried when her dad got up and sung "Father & Daughter" by Paul Simon..... i laughed at all the funny/embarassing photos that were being projected onto a screen during speeches by friends and family... and i got absolutely shitfaced and met lots of fun people, and danced til my feet hurt later that night at the goth club. hehehehe goth clubs are funny. they actually played awesome music. i just wish i had been wearing fluro colored clothes or something :D

the following day i was completely dead. i kept moving between my bed and the couch, and i couldn't stand to sit up at the computer for more than 30 seconds, so EVEN if i had been able to string together a coherent sentence, blogging was out of the question.

work has been..... worky. still enjoying it. i've been in super duper productive mode since a certain someone has gone on holidays. its amazing how much work i can accomplish during a day when i am distractionless. hehehehe jk.

mum's been in sydney this week since the Hair Expo last weekend. She arrives in Brisbane on Saturday and we've got a kick ass night planned. Dinner with cousins and mum at a mexican restaurant *droooools* and then we're catching a late night secret Wil Anderson gig at the Comedy Club. He's been performing nightly for the past couple of weeks and Saturday is his last two shows.... so he decided to put on a secret gig after his last show- "lots of drinking, swearing and maybe even a special guest". Luckily Aaron had signed up to his mailing list, so as soon as we heard about it we booked tickets! And only $10!!!! I hear its already booked out.

I have to admit, I am kinda regretting not going to see his Kil Wil show with work people or with my cousins. I passed up both opportunities to go along. But every week I watch the Glass House and I have to say, he's pretty funny. I'm glad i'll get to see him perform even if he's trashed and tired.

So after what could end up being a late and very fun night, we're playing hairdressers on sunday- so expect new hair and lots of cam action. altho i want to cut it short again, i think i'll leave bits of it longer while its still winter. when summer rolls around again *snip* it'll all be gone. but for now, i would like to embrace the mullet and shaggy bits.

i found a tonne of awesome hair pics the other day, while looking on myspace. there are just so many young, cute, goth/punk girls on there with the most kick ass hair- its depressing. so the best i can do is COPY their hair styles.

anyway lunch is half over and i'm starving

Shagalicious

A new beer, "Shag Beer" is going to be banned because it outrageously links alcohol and sex with its marketing slogan "Fancy a Shag?"

And no other alcohol advertising campaign has ever linked sex with their products? come on, what a crock. Sex sells, we all know it. What about the Cougars ad campaign- plaster the logo on a little itty bitty tshirt and get a buxom blond to squeeze her huge jugs in it. That's a sure fire way to get people to remember your brand name. So its not refering to sex in the same direct way Shag beer is, but its still using sex to sell!

However, using sex to sell products is cheesy and overdone. The best ad campaign in the whole wide world is the Carlton Draught ads... "MADE FROM BEER". you can view the 2 tv ads here.
my favourite line is,

"Driven around, by horses.... MORE HORSES!" hehehhehe

Anyways, before this beer becomes extinct, we are hopefully going to try and get some for friday afternoon drinks... because yes i do fancy a shag.



Russell the Slighty Aggressive Bear

Oh Russ, what have you done? Gone and lashed out at some poor concierge for giving you attitude. Tsk tsk.

Who would have thought a lost Late Show sketch would one day ring so true? For Russell Crowe most certainly is... SHIRTY the Slightly Aggressive Bear. You can see the clip when Shirty's identity is revealed on this site.



Schapadlock

This morning on Sunrise, there was a brief article about some guy wanting to name a brand of luggage after Schapelle Corby, called Corby's bags or something. I didn't hear the whole thing and I can't find any articles online about it, however they were discussing whether it was insensitive or not. I guess the arguement for would be that he's using Schapelle's notoriety to promote luggage security - to prevent this kind of thing from happening to anyone else. That said, I think its pretty insensitive... kinda like the Schapadlock email that's been going around.

We went over and checked out the new Queens Plaza (PIC 1, PIC 2), across the road from work, this afternooon. its a shopping center, that's only just opened. they have been excavating the site and building for the past 2 or more years. and finally it has opened, only 6 months or so overdue!
anyway starbucks, right on the corner was giving away FREE anythings! billy and i enjoyed a tasty caramel frappachino each and had a quick wander through the center.

we were scouting out the food court and saw a shop that had the tag line "Mediterranean Cuisine and Kebabbery", We both pissed ourselves laughing and billy informed me that there is a place called the Fish and Chippery. WHAT THE HELL?

So we headed back to work (stopping by starbucks to get a SECOND free frappachino each... Caramel for me again. i am now dying a slow and painful death related to caramel overdosing), and thanks to the psuedo-dictionary, we now have a definition for Kebabbery.


kebabbery - The study of making Turkish kebabs.

e.g., What a loser job he has, working like a robot in a kebab shop. "Don't judge him, he might have a PhD in Kebabbery for all you know."